Hizbollah won't Disarm

I, Prophet of prophets commend the righteous leader of the Freedom Fighters known as Hizbollah, for he fights the infidels and Little Satan with great perseverance. Of course, my beloved follower Sheik Hassan Nasrallah doth bask in the pleasures and advantages of those given unto him from my beloved Persian President Ahmadinejad, seeker of the coming Al-Masih or Messiah to you infidels, and conquerer of the weak infidel nation of France.

And thus, Freedom Fighter Nasrallah vows to surrender the sword, for he doth not obey the laws of the infidel, and protects the spread of my Peaceful faith in Allah.

Speaking to hundreds of thousands of flag-waving supporters in bombed-out southern Beirut, he said giving up Hezbollah's weapons now "under this government ... means leaving Lebanon exposed before Israel to kill and detain and bomb whoever they want, and clearly we will not accept that."

I, Prophet of prophets, am pleased to see the President of Persia, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad usurp the power of the Great Satan's allies in the UN, and the feable-minded in Europe, to enable my Freedom Fighters to push Little Satan into the sea.

But even I, Great Prophet of Islam, doth find it hard to understandeth the strategem of Great Satan and Little Satan, for they still alloweth the feable Europeans to control their fate.