We're the only Ones Sick & Fraudulent Enough

Ever wonder what it would be like to be in two places at once? Well, meet Retired Police Officer Charles B. Lincoln who managed to work two government jobs, while giving the effort required of one.

From the AP:

A retired Brockton police lieutenant was charged with mail fraud in federal court on Friday for what prosecutors said was a scheme to dishonestly inflate his pension by $52,000 annually by abusing sick leave so he could work two public jobs.

Charles B. Lincoln, 65, of Middleborough, was a 32-year veteran of the Brockton Police Department who for the last three years of his career also worked as director of security at the Plymouth County jail.

Lincoln frequently called in sick, even when he was not ill, to one of his jobs so he didn't have to show up at both on the same day, prosecutors said.

Lincoln, who retired from both jobs in January 2004, used 106 sick days at the Brockton Police Department in 2003 alone, prosecutors allege. By using sick leave, vacation and personal days, Lincoln worked just 60 full days and 14 partial days as a Brockton officer that year, prosecutors said.

Remember, these "professionals" are the folks we entrust our safety to, and if he's too tired to work two jobs, we owe him another sick day. I mean it would just be harsh and unfair to force Mr. authority figure to give a job 100%.